I consider myself a realist, and a situation that confuses me is one that I feel is experienced all around the world. that situation arrives when a man finds a woman attractive but doesn't want to be a couple. Ladies always say they want a man to be honest with them and to be 100% real. The thing is when we "real" men practice honesty we get the label of disrespectful or dog. No matter how we communicate our motives we get pushed underneath the line. What do we do then? We reexamine the rejection, come up with the conclusion that it is easier to get close to a lady tell choice lies and woo them until we get them comfortable enough to give us what we wanted in the beginning. The thing that sticks out then is the fact that we still don't want a relationship. Now we get tired of the sex, or want to move on. Females then become victims of the hit it and quit it stigma. (By this point in my blog men at least should relate to what I'm saying and know where I'm going with this.)
Men what do you think of what I have to say? Do you experience the same things? Ladies what's the correct way of coming at you when we know that we aren't out looking for a girlfriend? or better yet ladies is it wrong to you all to even want such a situation? Is it viewed as immature thinking? one female told me that it is, and I challenged her to teach me the right way, or show me the light. Needless to say she wasn't able to do it and continued to beat around the George Bush! SO SOUND OFF?????
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Honesty is the best policy. I think of it as a matter of respect: do you respect her enough to say you don't want a relationship and do you respect your reputation enough to care. I know of men who can get women to comply to any request that they make for the simple fact that the women already know what it is. They can't be mad when he's sleeping with other women cause he told them that up front. Its when the man is sneaking around and lying to get what he wants that his tires get sliced LOL (btw I don't do that)
ReplyDeleteI can only speak for myself. First off I do want a man that can be honest with me just like I will be honest with him.One thing that I noticed is that everyone can't handle a honesty. Your right its all about the approach I can respect someone that comes to me real (thing that I can say is that I very much dislike when somebody tries to talk to me and feels the need to cuss)But I agree with the young lady above its a respect thing. First off you gotta ask do u respect her(just as she stated above). I have had guys come at me in the past like that and I give them props for not beating around the bush. The fact of the matter is it that I know what I want and I respect myself to much to put myself in these type of situation. To many women allow these situations to happen to them because they believe if they do give it up then you might just stay around( so not true ladies). Even after you have told them you dont want a relationship. So some ladies need to take off the rose colored glasses and see whats real and whats not. I have always had the mindset that every man that approaches me wants something. He might want sex, friendship, to be my man. But you better believe he wants something or he would not have approached me. And as far as what the appropriate way for this particular situation I think being up front is a good choice. But don't say I wanna fuck, or when we gon have sex. This is when ppl start feelin disrespected. Guys you know when a women just wanna have sex and when shes looking for a little more.
ReplyDelete@tweetgirl00 -Yea I feel you lady. Men have to realize that it's better to be honest. I personally have tried both ways and honestly I've had way more "luck" falsifying my intentions. It's personal growth that makes me be more honest with them you know. Thing is, when u meet a female that you are attracted to you don't know her enough to say you want a relationship. Most of the time it's an attraction I feel in my loins, or stomach. I DON'T KNOW HOW TO CHANGE THAT..LOL
ReplyDelete@NitaP - I see what you are saying. I see it far more times than not. The ladies today that are the most open and real seem to me to be better friends, better lovers, & girlfriends for real. I challenge ladies to be more open and honest. I don't think that they realize how hard it is to approach a female on either level . it takes courage that's why most guys choose liquor to get that liquid courage. I like the way you used " rose colored glasses" it's so real. You remember the song by Outcast! "ROSES REALLY SMELL LIKE-BOO BOO BOO BOOO" LOL!!!
ReplyDeleteGuys feel that the woman might want sex but doesn't want to feel like a whore so they say they don't. Guys also feel ladies want to be chased so they say the right words and go on some dates to get to that comfort zone to eventually get to that sweet spot. Another thing to think though NitaP, is what if the man likes a female, waits till she's ready for sex, and it's NO GOOD!!!! That is the worse. Now you might say teach her. Thats fine but personally I want a female to have certain skills first. I want the head to be on some good level, she has to bring something to the table other than JUST good vagina.That is a reason I don't like to wait long. I'm still learning though! in Usher voice- "CAN YOU HELP ME"!!!LOL
Carlito, women want what men want, but afraid becuz of the 'stigma' Truth is, if she finds a quiet guy who doesnt blab everything...shell be ok...
ReplyDelete@ Anonymous YEA UR RIGHT.(REQUESTING NON JUDGEMENT)LOL I have had a lot of different situations involving ladies that guys never think was possible. They ask me how did I get them to do certain things. The truth is most of the fun things I've done with females, they were actually interested highly and said to me-they just don't want to be judge or thought of as a whore! Once you make a woman feel comfy to be herself she play. Just don't turn the switch one day, stay the same and let her know u accept her. Who knows fellas she might teach you a thing or three.......
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